Blogging Motivation?

Big Ten Baby!

So!  About a week after my last post (and yes, I know it was three months ago!), and about a week after my 30th birthday, Matt and I found out that we were expecting!  As I hinted at in my birthday post, our journey to become parents has not been an easy road - nor has it been as challenging a journey as so many other couples struggle with.  It took us sixteen months (and three cycles of fertility meds) to get to this point, and frankly ... it still doesn't seem real.  I have been wanting to blog about Baby Smith for awhile (we officially "came out" on Facebook and Twitter a few weeks ago), but I think it's just been so hard for me to believe that this is really happening.  After wanting something so much, for so long, and then it finally happens ... it's very overwhelming.  So basically, this pregnancy is flying by and I feel like I'm not doing a very good job of focusing on what's happening!  Which means that maybe, JUST maybe, it's time to start up the old blog again.  I'd like to keep track of my weekly photos and stuff (because I have been HORRIBLE at taking photos so far).  So, I'm not making any promises, but let's just see where this goes. :)

{Insert crazy caption here about pee stick obsession}

I found out I was pregnant on February 17th, 2012.  My due date is October 29th - SO thrilled to be having a fall baby!  Fall is my favorite season, and our wedding anniversary is 11/8.  My gut feeling is that we will have a November baby, and not an October baby, but who knows!  Here's our 8 week ultrasound photo:

Gummy bear baby!

Anyway, my photos from 4 weeks through 14 weeks are kind of spotty and inconsistent, so I'm going to start with today's photo (15 weeks!  Yay!) and just consider myself caught up!  :)

How far along?  15 weeks exactly!  


How big is baby?  Around 3 ounces, measuring between 4-5 ounces in length.  Little peanut!

Total weight gain:  I'm fluctuating between one pound below prepregnancy weight and one pound over.  So I guess I'll take the average and say ... no weight gain yet.  

Maternity clothes? I have one pair of maternity capris (worn in the photo above and almost every day of every week) and a maternity jean skirt that is a bit too big for me still.  I have a couple of maternity t-shirts and tanks but mostly just repurposing my wardrobe (don't the fashion bloggers call that a "remix"??) and trying to make non-maternity stuff last as long as possible.  Maternity clothes are expensive!  Oh, but I did just score this super cute maternity dress from Gilt Groupe to wear to Lisa's bridal shower in a couple of weeks (and maybe rehearsal dinner in July, too!):

Yes, my self-portraits are usually taken at my work bathroom.  What of it?

Sleep:  I slept absolutely horribly all through the first trimester, with crazy dreams and getting up to pee 800 times a night.  Then, a couple of weeks ago, I started sleeping GREAT and it's been so wonderful ever since!  The only thing bothering me is that I will sleep in one position for most of the night, and when I wake up, my arm is always asleep.  #firstworldproblems.   

Cravings: I was really into fruit a few weeks ago and couldn't get enough strawberries, watermelon and raspberries.  But right now, no real cravings or food aversions, which is great!  

Best moment this week: Having Matt take the photo above ... and realizing that Baby Smith has definitely popped over the last few days!  My ambiguously fat beer gut/baby gut is slowly turning into a for-real baby belly!  

Movement: None yet - I cannot WAIT for this! 

Gender: Team Green for now ... we will find out in about 5 weeks if we're having a boy or a girl!  Almost everyone has told me they think I'm having a girl.  Matt and I have absolutely no idea or intuition at all, so who knows!  

Belly Button in or out? Innie. 

What I miss:  Really, nothing.  I am so very happy and thankful to be here ... I couldn't care less about missing out on wine, or delicious soft cheeses, or even sushi!  Oh, okay, I do miss something.  I miss being able to eat something - anything - without it giving me crazy heartburn.  I eat a strawberry = heartburn.  I have a sip of water = heartburn.  ARGH.   

Weekly Wisdom:  Well, I have no wisdom.  I don't know what I'm talking about yet.  :)

Milestones: Happily cruising through the 2nd trimester and feeling great!  


So, there ya have it.  Baby Smith, coming 10/29/12!  Oscar cannot WAIT to have a baby brother or sister.  Can't you tell?

A New Decade

Hello, long lost blog friends.  It's me.  Do you remember me?  Here's a recent photo just in case you have forgotten about me.  I wouldn't blame you, after all.  It's been almost six months.

Lots of things have happened in the last six months.  Most importantly, I started playing around with hot rollers (see above).  Okay, that's probably not the most important thing.  I don't really know what the most important thing is, but all I can say is ... you know you go too long without logging onto Blogger when every time you log in, the format has changed.  I must say that I am LOVING this new Blogger.  Nicely done, Google!

Anyway.  Today, I turn 30.  Another decade down.  It feels weird ... yet exciting.  I love birthdays, and I have never shied away from aging.  Seeing a new decade (you know, the one that starts with a 3) is definitely going to be an adjustment, but it's not one I'm unhappy about.  Every year of my life thus far has brought joy, new adventures, new experiences, and new friends.

These last ten years have been good to me.  I graduated from college, earned my graduate degree, moved to Virginia, got a job, quit that job, met the love of my life, got another job, became a puppy parent to Oscar, got another job, moved from Virginia to Indiana, got married, got a new job, said goodbye to my husband for a year and dealt with deployment, welcomed him home again (which remains one of the best days of my life), got ANOTHER new job (definitely the best yet), and ... bam.  All of a sudden, ten years have passed.

I'm not exactly where I thought I would be at 30.  If you would have asked me ten years ago what my life would be like now, I would have guessed that I would be happily married (check), have a house (nope) and a couple of kids (nope, unless you count the furry one with a tail), and feel settled (nope).

The happily married thing, I've had down for over three years now.  But the rest has proven to be a bit of a challenge.  We don't have a house, because we're not really settled.  Our future is very up in the air right now, and we're not quite sure where we'll be a year from now.  Our journey to become parents has been filled with challenges, heartache, and loss instead of joy and excitement, and this is something I'm struggling with every day.  I'm really hoping that the stars align for us soon, that 2012 is our year for so many things.

That being said, I'm happy.  I have Matt.

I have my sweet friends and family.  I have the best dog a gal could ask for.

Overall?  Life is good.  Life is great.  I may not be where I thought I'd be, but I remain content and optimistic that the future holds good things for our little family.

Now.  My goal for this year?  Smile more with my mouth open.  :)

My 30th birthday plans are to go to work, have a fantastic dinner with Matt (I'm thinking sushi ... our go-to special occasion pick), and snuggle.  I'm throwing myself a 30th birthday party next week, and I'm having tons of fun with some planning and decorating and crafting.  I'm hereby considering February my Birthday Month - why celebrate a day when you can have a whole month?! - and will ring in 30 with style!

So, hey everyone.  Not sure if I'll be back for real or not ... but know that I'm here, I'm alive, I'm on Twitter, and I'm keeping up with your lives ... I'm just not so great at commenting these days.  xxoo

Friday Mishmash

So, first of all ... wow.  Just checked out the new Blogger and it's kinda rocking my world a little bit!  As in, I am really confused and stuff.  But I like it, I think!  I think.  Hmm.

Anyway, I am finishing up my second week at work and I still love it.  It's seriously fabulous.  I love being on campus, and have figured out the bus situation a little bit better - now I take the bus from our apartment, and I don't have to drive at all!  Very exciting stuff.  Really.  :)  My office still looks as sad as it did last week, but I think Matt and I will be heading on campus this weekend to change all of that.  Stay tuned for photos of my new decorated office sometime next week!

In other news, I haven't been sewing as much as I would like (and must remedy that) but I did work on a little craft fun for Oscar recently.  I don't remember why exactly, but I was talking with Lisa online about something related to dogs, and I was on Etsy so I searched for "husky" to see what kind of fun handmade husky gear I could find.  Well, amazingly enough, one crazy thing popped up.  It turned out to be a digital image I could buy for $1 and then use for ... well, whatever.  It was so incredibly that I snatched it right up, swung by Hobby Lobby, and grabbed a canvas tote bag and some iron on transfer paper.  And the result?  Is kind of amazing.

Hmmm.  Let's take a closer look, shall we?

Seriously.  I don't know who thinks something like this up (oh wait, yes I do - I picked this bad boy up from Graphique), but it is spec-tac-u-lar.  It's a husky.  With a crown.  And wings.

No, I don't understand.  Yes, it looks almost exactly like Oscar.  No, Oscar doesn't really need his own tote bag.  Although yes, he does pack a bag when he goes to stay with Mamaw and Papaw.

So yes.  Clearly it was necessary.  I find it absolutely hilarious and often look at it hanging in the closet and giggle.

Anyway - I can't believe we're already at Labor Day weekend!  And I can't believe it's September.  We don't have any plans this weekend, besides watching college football and babysitting sweet baby Madeline.  What about you?

New Job and New Office!

This is the face of someone who is happy going to work in the morning. It's a new feeling, so I'm still getting used to it. This morning I took this photo with my computer on my way out the door, wearing my fancy new IU polo shirt for Welcome Week festivities. This job? Is so much fun. There's a lot to learn, but nothing that I can't handle. The people? Are fantastic. Everyone in my school is incredibly friendly, open and welcoming - something I really craved at my last job but never encountered. After three years in an extremely hostile work environment where nobody really seemed to like each other, this is such a breath of fresh air.

My first day was Tuesday, and I jumped right in and tried to start learning stuff. My boss took me out to lunch (thai food ... delish!), which was fun, and this morning they had a welcome breakfast for me. So nice! I actually got to meet some students this afternoon at the open house we hosted for freshmen. We had a great turnout, and it was lots of fun.

Working on a college campus is the best part of this job - I absolutely love taking the bus to work. Strange, I know, but there's something so enjoyable about sitting down, opening a book, and zoning out for the ten whole minutes it takes me to get there. I love spending some time walking outside, and yesterday - despite the crazy heat and the fact that it was dorm move-in day - I walked across campus to downtown to go to the library. Just the fact that I could walk there, and then walk to a different bus stop and take the bus home, totally made my day. Sometimes, it's just the little things, you know?

Anyway ... so yeah. All in all, the new job is fab. Still have a ton of stuff to learn, but that's okay. School starts next week, so I better learn quickly!

Another awesome part about my new job? My new office. For those of you who may not remember, here is a photo of the entirety of my office at the high school:

Yes, that really is all of it. Not pictured: the electrical box for the school, another smaller electrical box, and a small fried-looking box plugged into the wall I was told never to remove because it was linked to the school's alarm system.

Behold: my new, grown-up office, full of all sorts of excitement:

It definitely needs a little bit of decoration ... hopefully will have some stuff hung on the walls by next week.

I have my own thermostat! How awesome is that?!

Trust me ... after spending my summer sweltering at the high school (you know, not too many people there, so they weren't worried about keeping it cool), having an office with my own personal thermostat is muy exciting.

To be honest ... once I got used to my tiny office at North, I really grew to love it. It stopped seeming tiny to me (until I had more than one other person in it, of course). But, um, now? Just looking at that photo makes me feel claustrophobic. It doesn't take long to feel spoiled, eh?

Anyway, just wanted to give you an update on the new gig. In a word: lovely. :)

All Done

Well, it's all over. All done. Yesterday was so much harder than I thought it was - it was very busy, and I kept thinking at the last minute of more kids I didn't get the chance to see and say goodbye to. There are a couple of kids - two girls, two boys - I feel extremely close with, and saying goodbye to them was torture. After giving one of them a hug, I teared up and then was in tears on and off the rest of the afternoon, culminating in some awkward sobs while saying goodbye to coworkers. Awkward. It was about infinity times harder than I thought to leave a job I have been so desperately trying to get away from for so many months.

BUT! But. Enough about that. It's over and done and now I am enjoying a three day weekend before starting my new job on Tuesday. Special long weekend activities involve: reading, laundry, cleaning, blogging, having breakfast on Monday with my friend Kyle, and possibly taking myself to see the last Harry Potter movie in the theater. I am currently rereading all of the Harry Potter books - gosh, they are just so good! I just read the first one last week and I got the second one from the library yesterday. I'm sure I will have that one done by the end of the weekend. What are you reading right now?

In other news ... I'm on Pinterest and it's so fabulous. Click here to follow my Pinboards. I also run the Pinterest page for Fantabulously Frugal Weddings, so if you want to see a bunch of beautiful wedding inspiration, click here and follow us too!

That's all for now ... must get back to my Saturday tasks of making roasted tomato soup (recipe to follow if it's tasty) and watching Party Down on Netflix. :)

Last Day!

Well, this is it - today is my last day of work at the high school. Lots of feelings and emotions, most of them very very joyful. Although I still have a couple of nagging icky feelings, mostly about making sure someone is taking care of my kids when I leave. And that's hard. But I need to let go. I need to concentrate on my own life and what's ahead of me, which is all good stuff!

I am beyond excited about my new job. The staff there is already more welcoming and more interested in what I have to bring to the table than my coworkers at my current (soon to be old) job ever were. I will have a real office, not a closet without ventilation. I will have real coworkers who are ... nice to me. I will be part of a team. It's definitely time.

What will I miss? A couple of coworkers, but only a couple. A lot of students. Saying goodbye to them has proven to be extremely difficult. The thought of never seeing them again is really hard - I mean, okay, I'll probably run into them at the mall or Walmart or something, but it won't be the same. And that's okay, it's just an adjustment.

But you know what I will miss the most? The students who drop by just to say hi, the ones who came in before school started this week to see how my summer was, the kids who smile from ear to ear when they get a passing grade. Those couple of coworkers - now friends - who helped keep me sane over giggling lunches and eye rolling sessions.

Sigh.

But enough of that. It seems only fitting that today, on my last day of work, I leave you with one final "Overheard from my Office - High School Edition."

Girl walking into counseling department: "Hi, I need to change my lunch from A lunch to B lunch."

Me: "Why?"

Girl: "Ummm because, um, there's this girl, I think she's a lesbian, and she won't stop staring at my boobs."

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand scene.

Saying Goodbye Sucks.

Even when you're excited about saying it.

I was planning on telling y'all that I was taking a blogging break ... well, an OFFICIAL blogging break, at any rate. I have clearly been taking quite the break over the past several months. Like I say every time I come back ... I just haven't felt like it. But, suddenly I have a bit of inspiration. So, here I am again, trying again. If it doesn't work, I'll take an official break until life seems blogworthy again.

So, who am I saying goodbye to? My kiddos at school. I just got an absolutely amazing new job at Indiana University as an academic advisor. I am THRILLED. So thrilled I am counting down the seconds until my first day of work. More excited than I have ever been for a new job before! The hard part, of course, is saying goodbye to everyone at the high school. School starts on Tuesday the 16th, and my last day will be Friday the 19th. I will have four days to say my goodbyes.

I have started telling some people - I called a parent I am incredibly close with and told her my news today. She cried and I felt awful. :( Then one of my fave students came in to handle some schedule changes and to fill me in on her summer, and I had to tell her, too. And she was way more bummed out than I thought a teenager would be. I am really struggling with feeling like I'm letting these kids down by leaving them ... but at the same time knowing that I'm doing what's right for me, for my career.

But still. So hard.

Ever leave a job you cannot wait to say goodbye to, but have a hard time with it anyway?